My birth story

Birth for me is about being empowered to trust my body and baby and to be educated in all the decisions I make. One thing I always say is “If there is one thing women can do in this world, it is to birth babies (however that looks for you).

Going into my second pregnancy and birth I was more hesitant than my first. I knew that I could have the birth I longed for especially after my first empowering homebirth but there were some new fears that were popping up that I knew I would have to work through. I also felt like I hadn’t given myself the space to slow down, connect with my baby and body the way I did with my first and I also now knew what birth could be like and could I really do it again or had I just got lucky the first time around.

I decided we would do a refresher of our Hypnobirthing Australia course that we did for our first pregnancy (highly recommend to anyone, the best thing that both myself and husband could have done to prepare for birth). The refresher was a chance to review how our last birth went, see if there were any tools we could add to our toolkit and just refresh ourselves with strength and knowledge. Nikki from Connected Hypnobirthing was amazing again and reiterated that we know what to do. My baby and body will work in harmony.

We were accepted into our local MGP (midwifery group practice) and started the plan for another homebirth. Making sure that the people who would be supporting us shared and respected our values around birth.

After going to 41+3 with my first I certainly wasn’t expecting to get to this point with my second but here we were with the dreaded talk of induction looming. Birthing in a hospital setting is just not something I want to do and so avoiding induction was all I could think about. Some fears were popping up around birth that I needed to let go of (Will myself or baby end up in hospital? will baby breath straight away? What will I do with our toddler while in labour? How is our relationship going to change? Will I be able to handle being a mum of 2? Etc)

It was a Wednesday morning, and I was now 41+5 and my midwife gave me the option of going into Hospital for a wellness check, where they check baby, fluid, placenta, and that while there we could put a plan in place for if/when I would reach 42 weeks.

All was looking well with baby, fluid and placenta and baby was in the most perfect position for labour and so I was told to go home and rest and continue to aim for my homebirth but if the baby doesn’t come by 42 weeks that they would want to break my waters. I could of course decline the induction, but it would mean I would no longer be apart of MGP and have access to my midwife. So many thoughts going through my head. Do I refuse induction and freebirth? Do I contact a private midwife and see if they can look after me? Do I wait until Friday and then decide? Or can I trust that my birth journey will unfold exactly as it supposed too?

My midwife did a stretch and sweep and was confident baby would be here soon and she wanted me to try and relax as much as I could even with the induction plan in the forefront of my mind. I then went and had an acupuncture session with Lez from Deep Water Medicine (Highly recommend for pregnancy and general health and wellbeing), to see if we could get things moving along. He gave me some tips for my husband to use and we were hopeful I wouldn’t need the appointment I made for the next day.

Feeling a little deflated about the looming induction I contacted both Nikki and my student midwife Ely about what I could do to try and relax and bring on some natural oxytocin to hopefully put me into labour. My husband and I did a fear release, wrote a letter to our baby, dimmed the lights, did some light touch massage incorporating acupressure points and put on a comedy, this was around 8.30pm. I was having a few back aches/cramps and what I would describe as Braxton hicks which I had been having for the past week so nothing out of the ordinary.

Just before 9pm I felt the urge to go to the toilet and release my bowels, I had been gone a little while now and when I returned, I said to James “this baby is coming tonight”. I just knew.

We started to get the room set up – towels and blankets on the couch, water in our birthing pool and candles lit for my birth alter and to put my vision board up. Luckily the pool had been blown (5 weeks it had been blown up waiting for this moment).

At 9.23 James rang the hospital as my surges (contractions) were lasting around 1 minute and were coming every 3 minutes. They asked if I would like my midwife to make her way to us and I said yes just knowing that this baby was coming and coming fast.

At this point I was leaning over the couch (the same as my first birth), utilising the tens machine for when each surge would arrive. Compared to Leo’s labour these surges were so intense from the very first one (I don’t ever refer to them as pain, the only way to describe it is intense, the one affirmation that gets me through the surges is “This will pass”.

In between surges I was chatting to James asking (bossing him) around to hurry up with filling the pool and contacting our support people, student midwife, birth photographer and making sure my mum was on standby for our toddler.

At around 9.40 whilst kneeling against the couch I heard a huge pop and my waters had broken, I felt like things were really ramping now and I was hanging to get into the pool as I know how much the water gives me a sense of calm and is such an amazing relief for when the surges hit. James spoke to my midwife who was still on her way and said I could get into the pool if I wanted to and that she would see us in about 15 minutes.

Getting into the pool was just heaven. The feeling of calmness coming over me. I was able to really get into my zone here utilising my breath and swaying my hips with each surge. It’s almost like I go into a state of hypnosis. Occasionally looking up at my vision board. I do remember at one point asking James “where is everyone” not knowing how long (or quick) things had been going at this point.

Just before 10pm Ely arrived followed by my midwife, they quietly made their way inside and at this point my surges were back-to-back without much time between – Ill point out due to using my breath and hypnobirthing techniques I totally go inwards and was not very vocal which can make it hard for the midwife to know how far along you are etc.

Ely and Leonie didn’t want to disturb me, so they were waiting quietly for there to be a break in surges so they could say hello and check baby with a doppler.

James was by my side the whole time, offering me words of encouragement and giving me sips of water whenever I looked up. I suddenly felt an urge to push (unbeknown to anyone) it was almost like a reject/reflex feeling and babes head was out, it wasn’t until James said ‘I think there is a head, oh and now there is a body’ as I then pulled babe up and out of the water and onto my chest. Baby was born at 10.11pm

From the moment I pulled her up I just knew it was her. I had pictured my little girl before even conceiving her, from her dark hair to her blue eyes.

We then rested in the water for a little while until I felt like getting out and moved to the couch to snuggle our bundle and have a physiological third stage (birth the placenta). We opted for delayed cord clamping, once the cord stopped pumping James cut it and not long after I got the urge to push again and birthed the placenta which is probably more uncomfortable than the actual birth. By this stage our backup midwife had arrived and our birth photographer who unfortunately missed the birth but was able to capture some beautiful images of us bonding with our little girl.

After a couple of hours after checking both me (no tearing) and bubs weight, and after enjoying some homemade cake and cups of tea everyone left and it was just the 3 of us (with Leo asleep in his bedroom, oblivious to everything going on in the lounge room). I spent the rest of the night with our beautiful girl on my chest while we drifted off trying to decide on a name for her. 3 days later we decided on Halle Grace.

It was such a fast and unreal experience but peaceful all at the same time. My breath carried me through moments where I could have given up.

I am so proud of myself and so thankful to have a support system who just followed my lead and believed in me.

Birth truly is one of the most empowering experiences a woman will ever go through.

Halle: Scandinavian origin meaning heroine.

Grace: Latin origin meanings include charm, goodness, and generosity

Written by Jana - gratefully shared with her permission. I just loved reading Jana’s Birth Story - so much joy felt, giggles and tears - I hope many other mumma’s can feel the same when reading it, it is such a positive and empowering read. I absolutely loved sharing the Hypnobirthing Australia Refresher Course with Jana and James and supporting them once again. Welcome to the world Hypnobub Halle.

My Birth Story - Jana & James